The other night I had the wonderful experience of helping one of our group members do his 5th Step. Step 5 is where you share the contents of your “Fearless written moral inventory” from Step 4. Step 4 is daunting and isn’t called “Fearless” for nothing. But it can be done and has been done by millions of people. I’ve done it. It was hard but totally worth it. Then comes Step 5 where you share that inventory with another addict who has done their 12 steps and will understand. I was super nervous to do my own and I was also nervous to do my first with another sponsee a number of years ago. But since then I’ve grown to absolutely love doing them!! They truly highlight God’s power to transform people — sometimes in an instant. It is a real life miracle right before your eyes.
Two weeks ago when I left on vacation I was committed to following my plan to make sure that I studied my scriptures at least 15 minutes a day — most likely in the evening. This would be the difference in my plan this time versus all of the times in the past. Usually when I go on vacation I’m fairly triggered by the end of it and that would always frustrate me. After analyzing past experiences, I realized that it was because I wasn’t doing my morning studies which would result in me being more tempted, more frustrated, and more manic by the end of the trip. But this time would be different. Continue reading
We went for a boat ride on the canals of the south. By the end of the ride I was as relaxed as I had felt in months! It felt so good to be at such an incredible level of peace. Nothing bothered me. I wasn’t tense. I wasn’t anxious or worried. Nothing weighed on my mind. Ahhhh…
It reminded me that my counselor told me to go outside more often and to just pay attention to the little details or listen for the quiet sounds. The 11th step also reminds us to meditate daily.
This morning as I was reading my scriptures I went outside and just listened to nature. There were 4-5 different kinds of birds. There were cows. Horses. Dogs. Just going about their morning but it was so calming to take it all in. With each breath in I could feel how alive everything was. With each breath out I could feel my stress, worries and burdens leaving me.
God will care for my worries and burdens while I am gone. He cares for them when I’m home (and I let him), He always has. As I listened to God’s creations and as I watched His sun climb high into the sky, and felt it’s warmth on my face, I was once again reminded how much He genuinely loves us. Deeply. We’re so important to Him. Each one of us matters to Him on an individual level.
I felt lifted by the gratitude I felt. I am very thankful to be on this earth at this time doing whatever I can to help Him help others.
May I keep feeling His peace. May you feel His peace and love. He does love you!
My name is Mike